Click Here For Men.

Entertainment & Music

By Pamela Stitch ⋅ © zimbabwemetro.com ⋅ May 16, 2008 ⋅

Where are the few good men ? That seems to be the question of the day for many African women in the Diasporas. It seems that QUALITY men are like a needle in the haystack - they do exist but under a lot of chaff! How do you wade through the murky waters of wannabe players to find a prince? That seems to be the question of the day! Some hypothesis exists as to where one can find these men. These places ranges from the church to the gym.Though, many women can attest to using these methods to find the love of their lives , a lot of women with internet access - can tell more stories involving love, sex and technology. Yes- ladies and gents, I am talking about Cyber search, Cyber sex and Cyber love which take place often times during online dating.Now, how does that work?Simple- find a website that has the kind of sample that you want to be associated with and post a profile with a heading that will capture attention. I am a great fan of the name - “sexy kitten”. Of course, you might come across men who definitely use these forums, websites, online chat room - as their hook up, player rooms so make sure that you are very clear as to what you want from these men, and what characteristics you are looking for in a man.

Dangers Online

It will be quite remiss of me, if I only stress the positives of dating online without mentioning the dangers that exists. The main danger lies in two main species of men that can be found online and they are:

A) The Megalomaniac Liars: Lady A ( a personal friend from undergrad), had always known that she wanted to date a doctor. She meets a guy online via a hotmail chat room. He “seems” intelligent and kind from their conversation. He claims to be a doctor, 6 ft tall, handsome to the cue. He also claims that he is working with doctors without borders helping to cure the sick in a developing country. My friend is half in love. The rest of us are excited. Mr. Megalomania decides to come over to visit her after sometime - by this time, she has already reached the zenith of love, in fact, we were all seeing ourselves at her wedding. She opens her doors and there he is - short, definitely not a doctor, definitely not with doctors without borders, she keeps on trying to find something positive about him - but there is nothing positive, in fact he seems to have a lot of personal issues. She gets out of that relationship but not without some personal cost to herself.

Lesson to Learn - If the man seems too accomplished and is online, please check his credentials.

b) Mr. Hunk - This happened to another friend. She met Mr. Hunk at an online chat room, they clicked online. Mr,.Hunk describes himself as tall, chocolate brown, with sexy lips. He sends a picture over but in all his pictures, he is always SITTING down. She wonders about that but decides not to follow the warning signs to be careful about falling for him. She meets him at his spot and realised why he was always sitting down - he had lied about his height . (Why do men always lie about their height?). That was the first series of lies that led to more lies.

Lesson:

A man who lies about something as basic as height - has more lies in his back pocket waiting to pop out at a future opportunity and is definitely not for you. (No, height stories do not fall under advertising).

But it is not all doom and gloom online, I will end this post by telling this story of another friend of mine who met the love of her life online. My friend had gotten tired of meeting men set up for her by friends who were simply up to no good. Feeling very angry, she logs unto an online forum and posts her angst on a website. A guy reads it, recognizes her emotions and writes to her. They start talking a lot more and decide to meet. Though he wasn’t completely what she was looking for in a man physically. He was perfect in terms of emotional and mental maturity. They have been together ever since and might be getting married pretty soon.

My stance:

Take risks in dating but always ensure that you know exactly what you are in the market for, so you do not get yourself entangled in what will cause you pain. Oh, if you two decide to have sex - please, wear a condom. If you do decide to have cyber sex, please do not do it in a public computer room. I heavily recommend a darkened room, marvin gaye’s music, and a cyber web cam!

Enjoy - Aaliyah: Are You That Somebody?

Take Care Till Next Time,

Pammy

Pamela Stitch is Metro’s Entertainment & Music Columnist she writes from New York,USA and can be contacted on pamelastitch@zimbabwemetro.com

Share and Enjoy: These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and discover new web pages.

Sphere: Related Content

Hit the key board,Discuss,(Please note that comments that contain links may be marked as spam)

28 comments for “Click Here For Men.”

AHHH IWE NE-VARUME , AIWA HAMENO ZVAKO, UCHAFA WAKAIRUMA NE-ZINO AKO IWAYA,,,ARI PACHENA KUDARO..

Posted by prxtzh | May 16, 2008, 10:06 pm
Varume vanoroora verudzi rwedu havawanikwe painternet. This is sort of new technology and those who are surfing are the adventurous one!

Posted by nyika vanhu | May 16, 2008, 10:28 pm
LOL!!

Posted by Pamela Stitch | May 17, 2008, 12:32 am
what a breath of fresh air,i have been saturated with political stories,keep up the good work sis.

Posted by changachirere | May 17, 2008, 4:04 am
Pamela and tambu-i have been asking all along if you are singles so i can make my move-but you still blank me out.whats up with that?

forget cyber this and that -i am here so lets get it on.most of our sisters are not interested in us because they are chasing the dollar and the pond-true?

MAKOSI is living proof-she skinned that polish guy £75 000.00 and left him.We brothers havent got this sort of money to waste-we invest back home if we get it.

That means our sisters will blank us out if we are not willing to spend-on the other hand if you are pretty and sexy and all that there will be no shortage of brothers chasing you.The bottom line is in foreign countries people have too many ojectives to pursue.Its not a level playing field.

Zulu always puts the sisters first-but it can be hard work.So we end up going for easy prey just to survive.all this cyber stuff will bring nothing but horror stories in the end-dirty sex games etc..

I love these articles because like changamire said -we are fed up of politics.

Are you still up for it?

Posted by zulu | May 17, 2008, 6:02 am
LOL! at Zulu - you want Tambi and Pammy at the same time??….:D

Posted by Pamela Stitch | May 17, 2008, 6:17 am
it is great stuff. maybe you are interested in dating rich women or young and charming men on social site, Sugarmommymeet.c o m. it caters to rich women seeking charming and handsome men for love.

Posted by Johnyang | May 17, 2008, 6:19 am
Who is Ms. happy ending I wonder???

Posted by Mr. C | May 17, 2008, 6:35 am
IF YOU TWO DONT MIND -I HAVE NO PROBLEMS WITH IT.I KNOW MY SISTERS ARE SUFFERING BECAUSE THE GUYS ARE SCARCE.I AM ONLY DOING MY PART.IT WILL PROBABLY BE A ONE OFF.YOU MIGHT ENJOY IT TOO -WHO KNOWS?

THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS!!!!

Posted by ZULU | May 17, 2008, 6:51 am
:O

no comment! Zulu….

Posted by Pammy | May 17, 2008, 6:53 am
how about pammy setting up a dating website with a zim core and moderator.that way we will identify better with that sort of thing.its time for the brothers and sisters to accept the social dynamics of the world we are in.after all the purpose is to make people meet and date.also why not hold singles parties in support!!

i will drink to that!!1

Posted by changachirere | May 17, 2008, 1:13 pm
THATS WHY WE END UP IN NO MEN’S LAND PAM—-NO COMMENT LEAVES ME EMPTY HANDED.WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO THINK? HAVE YOU BLANKED ME OUT?

Posted by ZULU | May 17, 2008, 4:16 pm
Pammy,how about women?? Are there good women? Im not talking about the looks, boot and stuff… Does that animal really exist??

Posted by sexmore masvi | May 17, 2008, 11:03 pm
[...] [...]

Posted by cam chat | May 18, 2008, 6:00 am
Pammy’s response:

Online dating does work - my friend just got married a couple of months ago and she met her husband online but not on a dating site - more like a social networking site.

Dating site for zim: I really do not know if that will work- there seems to be some negative connotations to those who use online dating sites, many prefer to use these sites privately. Give it some time….

Sugar daddies /Sugar mommies - this post isn’t about those who date them, I was writing about those who choose to date online because of the plethora of choices that exists there..

Makosi : I knew that there was a reason that I am saving my money for a set of breast implants!!!

Posted by Pammy | May 18, 2008, 11:24 am
it wont hate anybody to start one and of course the the time is right.

hey pammy you just worstned my hang over with your negativity.

cheers

Posted by changachirere | May 18, 2008, 3:49 pm
ZANU PF Re-Load Part 1. Please Wait…… Loading……..One Beautiful Country Found…..ZIMBABWE…………. Loading internal country data………. ZANU PF Party Found…………. Checking potential threats …………….. Downloading……………… No Potential Threats…………… Checking for Presidential status………… Loading Presindetial Information……….. HE RG Mugabe Life Presindent Found. Pamberi Ne ZANU PF…………… Please Wait…………. External Threats found……………. Downloading …………………….. Bush, Brown, Tsvangirai…………………. Please Wait ……………….. Transmiting data…………………………….. Loading Election Run-Off ……………………… Please wait……………………..Checking for Presidential Candidates………………… Downloading ……………….. RG Mugabe found……………. Please Wait……… Loading ……………… Looking for potential contestant……… One Wathog found………….please wait………….unable to establish data…………..Pleasse wait…………………… Only one Real Man found…………Downloading Personal Information…………….. Please Wait………. First Names: Robert Gabriel, Surname: Mugabe, Marital Status: Married to a Beautiful Grace Mugabe……….Downloading………….Please Wait…………..

Posted by Chass | May 18, 2008, 4:10 pm
LOL At changa….

Posted by Pammy | May 18, 2008, 5:21 pm
chass - please, give me a break!!!

Posted by Pammy | May 18, 2008, 5:22 pm
Hey Pammy! Your atticles are interesting to read! Keep up! Some of us back home also get to read them with owe!! Its funny how ladies are starved of good men out there! Anyway, enlighten me, whats cyber sex??

Posted by ketai | May 19, 2008, 2:47 am
WOW!I DONT KNOW IF WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT MAKING A WOMAN LAUGH IS TRUE.LOL.

Posted by changachirere | May 19, 2008, 11:25 am
ketai : thanks :). Trust me: If I describe what cyber sex is, there will be a lot of ppl getting peeved off….

changachire:

Posted by Pammy | May 19, 2008, 5:02 pm
Hey Pam … why dont you start this dating site. Maybe some of us can get to meet Mr Right cuz we have been all over but only hurt. Are there good guys out there i wonder.

Posted by Cool Cat | May 20, 2008, 12:05 am
Hey Pammy, what about you and i hooking up? Ndiri kushava ndiri ku Canada, nyaya yedating iyi inonetsa. was going out with a white gal for the past year, asi ndiri kuona kuti kuroora kunoda mwana wekumusha.

Posted by Musiyamwa | May 21, 2008, 3:01 am
i dont understand your response can you elaborate please pam,great article though

Posted by changachirere | May 21, 2008, 2:45 pm
Pam, Pam, Pammy!! Sometimes you are very ellucive! Alright,I take your word. To avoid some people getting “peeved off” can you respond on what cyber-sex is to my email? sketai@yahoo.com

Posted by ketai | May 22, 2008, 12:17 am
[...] [...]

Posted by cyber sex | May 23, 2008, 11:25 pm
[...] [...]

Posted by whats cybersex | June 30, 2008, 2:42 pm